March 2013
We packed our bags full & heavy and went with empty arms ready for our 2 year old daughter 8,000 miles away. We didn't sleep much on that long flight from San Fran to Beijing China. Too much anticipation!! Our tickets were changed in San Fran and we didn't sit together. The flight was packed with locals returning home after the Chinese New Year. Packed. But God orchestrated a native Chinese woman named Gia for me to sit beside. She grew up in China and talked about the culture, the language and waiting for her husband to find Christ as she had several years before. He was sitting a few chairs from her and that was what she talked about the most was how her faith had changed her life. Perspective.
We packed our bags full & heavy and went with empty arms ready for our 2 year old daughter 8,000 miles away. We didn't sleep much on that long flight from San Fran to Beijing China. Too much anticipation!! Our tickets were changed in San Fran and we didn't sit together. The flight was packed with locals returning home after the Chinese New Year. Packed. But God orchestrated a native Chinese woman named Gia for me to sit beside. She grew up in China and talked about the culture, the language and waiting for her husband to find Christ as she had several years before. He was sitting a few chairs from her and that was what she talked about the most was how her faith had changed her life. Perspective.
Just like any child, AnnaBelle loves to be told the story of when she came home. We have told the story many times. She loves to hear about when she was little, what she learned first or said first.
This girl, has had a lot of questions. She is inquisitive about everything. Several times a day she will say, 'Mom I have a question". She has asked some hard questions since she has been home, "why didn't you come faster mom? You know I was hungry and thirsty?" Try answering that question. There is no reasonable answer.
This girl, has had a lot of questions. She is inquisitive about everything. Several times a day she will say, 'Mom I have a question". She has asked some hard questions since she has been home, "why didn't you come faster mom? You know I was hungry and thirsty?" Try answering that question. There is no reasonable answer.
Adoption is really such a reflection of Gods love and restoration in us. It has hard parts and loss wrapped inside it but Gods story throughout the bible is the same way. His goodness always shines through and he loves us so much. AnnaBelle has overcome many hard places of life in the last 5 years home. She literally survived her first 2 years in her birth country. Orphanage care is similar no matter where at, the caretakers have more children to take care for than is possible. A forever family and a home is the best place to be. There are so many children still waiting in orphanage care, waiting for a forever family to come! As regulations with international adoption change, less families are adopting internationally. I just read international adoption was down 81% from 2004. Which means more precious children are waiting.
I could name so many milestones for her that do not make sense or seem to matter to the average kid. I wish I could explain the magnitude of some of those milestones because looking from the outside, they seem insignificant but they aren't. Kids from hard places & from traumatic beginnings have endured more than most of us can understand. They are survivors.
The past 2 years its like God has placed a fast forward button.
Bringing forth a more confident and brave daughter.
A scripture I have prayed for both our girls is Jeremiah 17:7- 8.
I read it a few years ago looking for a scripture to pray for both of the girls specifically about being confident in life and in the Lord. I love it and have written their names in my bible beside it with the date. (Do that sometime, its so neat to look back on how God has shed light on the scripture, answered a prayer or walked you through something.)
A scripture I have prayed for both our girls is Jeremiah 17:7- 8.
I read it a few years ago looking for a scripture to pray for both of the girls specifically about being confident in life and in the Lord. I love it and have written their names in my bible beside it with the date. (Do that sometime, its so neat to look back on how God has shed light on the scripture, answered a prayer or walked you through something.)
Jeremiah 17:7-8 "But blessed is the daughter who trust in the Lord, whose confidence is in him.
She will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when the heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit."
That is what I want for my girls! Confident in Gods purpose and plan for their lives no matter life's circumstances! I am dependent on God to fill in all the gaps, crevices and our shortcomings & failures, life's disappointments and hurts. We as parents will disappoint our kids, people and life will hurt them. But God never will. He is constant and good.
When we were in country we realized how much neglect our sweet girl had survived, we really didn't know what the long term affects would be emotionally and mentally. This is not uncommon for international kids or kids who have endured trauma even here in CPS care. I remember being home around 1 year home and we were still in the muddy waters of neglect/PTSD. It was a lonely time. But I was so thankful we were home and she was home with us!! Slow and steady connection has been the key. So so worth it! I love the toddler phases. Im so glad that we really did get to experience so many "first" with AnnaBelle coming home at 2. Our counsellor in the first year kept reiterating, "don't leave her in the nursery, or overnight and remember its a marathon not a sprint, neglect takes time to unwire and retrain the brain, your building trust and attachment" were our sessions. And we were bone weary from lack of sleep. That did not change quickly. Healing takes time and connection and is worth it! Karyn Purvis does a lot of adoption training. It was a golden key for us to understand trauma and parenting in a way best for our girl.
Our travel group was such a support in country and still is today as we have stayed in touch. We have watched families face unknown medical obstacles, emotional challenges and children flourish being in their forever families since coming home! One of my prayers for our travel group 5 years ago was that God would orchestrate our travel mates ahead of time. He answered our prayers.
I am also MORE thankful for the blessings in my life, more certain of God and more patient. I have more projects and less organization and have read more books on trauma than I can recount. And more of a passion for adoptive parents and more aware of the orphan crisis and need for training for adoptive parents. I have adoptive mom friends who are so dear to me and I am thankful to the Lord for their friendships. This is the body of Christ in action, supporting and encouraging one another as we raise our precious kids. Hebrews 12:1 says, Let us encourage one another on as the big day approaches and we run this race. I have more love and joy for my family and the gift they are to us! And I need Jesus everyday to live & parent and finish this marathon, the way he wants me to.
Raising kids is like a marathon. Somedays Im frustrated by the sticky mess I cant keep up with, unfinished projects I don't get around to and no one helping mom out. But I wouldn't trade the mess & chaos for a quiet and clean home.! Our house was very quiet for many years before the girls. One day, Milton said in the middle of the chaos, "you prayed for this remember?" :) Of course we did!
All the years waiting for a family, I couldn't have imagined the joy our girls have brought us!
I am so glad uncertainty didn't creep in and keep us from pursuing adoption with Joy. And fear didn't win traveling across the globe and keep us from AnnaBelle. When the girls tell us we need "one more girl" I alway say, first we have to have a family meeting. Second we have to talk to Jesus about it. And AnnaBelle says, "Jesus will say yes mommy." Im thankful my girls have such big hearts and love one another! AnnaBelle tells us with certainty, mom there are more kids waiting you know. Oh baby girl you are right, she knows.
I have felt so blessed this year as both girls started school together and have had a great year. AnnaBelle has had the best teacher this year! We are eternally thankful for Mrs. T and how she has loved our girl so well! Her confidence has grown beyond my wildest expectations. The girl loves school, milestone alert. She would wear her school uniform on off days if I set it out. She loves to learn, read, math and be with friends. This week was a first milestone, she wanted to be dropped off and didn't need to be walked inside! Which is good and sad (for mom) but so brave and big for her! That seems small for most kids but for this girl we brought home 5 years ago, its a milestone. I could tell you so many more.
The girls make me laugh everyday!! Joy is growing up and it makes me sad and happy. I want to savor the time and enjoy right now with her. She is a bookworm and loves creating things. She should grow up to be a librarian or an art teacher, she would be great at both. She is funny and very smart. For Christmas she wanted a pink BB gun and at lunch she likes to shoot at the squirrels on the fence. It just fluffs their tails and sends them running. She would roller skate and read a book at the same time, if Id let her. She is really lives up to her name, she is a joy and Im thankful to be her mommy. AB says she wants to be a "Kindergarten school teacher and a mom to one kid." I believe she will be a strict Kindergarten teacher. Joy says she wants to be a mom to 50 kids, "so Im going to need a really responsible husband." I still laugh thinking about her telling me this. Hilarious! They told me last week if your over 40 years old your, "ancient" reported Joy. AB got a little mixed up and said, "whats an agent?" The confusion was going, thats how gossip gets started folks. That was funny too.
A few weeks ago I was talking about coloring my hair. Joy said, mom your hair WILL fall out if you do. I assured her it would not. It had not in the past. AB not convinced said, mom at least you know where to buy a wig!
Really, I do? I have never bought one before. :)
We added 6 chickens to our "pet" list in the Fall. AnnaBelle loves the chickens. She likes to feed them, catch them, hold them and thank them for laying eggs. Each one has a name and really they have personality. We accidentally ended up with a rooster named "Hay hay" that was supposed to be a hen, but thats another story. "Hay hay" was crowing and clucking which was confusing to everyone in the coop. But it wasn't long and the rooster had all of the hens in a tiff and his crow was perfected everyday at 5am so- it was time for the rooster to return to the country. Joy tells the story really well, maybe it will be a childrens book one day that she writes.
A few weeks ago I was talking about coloring my hair. Joy said, mom your hair WILL fall out if you do. I assured her it would not. It had not in the past. AB not convinced said, mom at least you know where to buy a wig!
Really, I do? I have never bought one before. :)
We added 6 chickens to our "pet" list in the Fall. AnnaBelle loves the chickens. She likes to feed them, catch them, hold them and thank them for laying eggs. Each one has a name and really they have personality. We accidentally ended up with a rooster named "Hay hay" that was supposed to be a hen, but thats another story. "Hay hay" was crowing and clucking which was confusing to everyone in the coop. But it wasn't long and the rooster had all of the hens in a tiff and his crow was perfected everyday at 5am so- it was time for the rooster to return to the country. Joy tells the story really well, maybe it will be a childrens book one day that she writes.
We pray every night that our girls will know Christ love and purpose for them first. Really our children are a gift from God and through the gift of adoption. I want to savor the time with them because as I watched with my nieces (who are in college), they grow up so fast!
2016 horse lessons with her riding horse, Penny.
The girls enjoy horse lessons every summer with a mom friend.
The girls enjoy horse lessons every summer with a mom friend.
2014 First gotcha day at home- we celebrate as Family day
First Easter and first day home 2013
called her early on. She was a great
travel mate and her travel investment
paid off with AnnaBelle. She is one
of her favorite people! And mine too.
First day of 3rd grade
Last picture we received prior to Gotcha Day
February 2013
"Childhood is a precious time. Don't wish it away."
Travel group 1976. March 2013.
Our adoption agency CCAI has helped over 12,000 children find their forever home! Chinese Children Adoption Agency in Denver & Houston (closest offices) were fantastic and we would highly recommend if you decide to pursue international adoption.
